Dear King 5,
That poll is BULLCRAP.
Signed,
Everyone supporting the candidates your poll says are losing
******
Dear Citizens,
H1N1 will kill us all if you don't get vaccinated.
Signed,
People who thought Hantavirus, Avian Flu, Ebola and SARS would annihilate humanity
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Monday, October 26, 2009
Letter Fiction #102609b
Dear Dow Constantine:
Letting my opponent frame the debate worked wonders for me!
Signed,
John Kerry
******
Dear Washington State:
A huge magma pool under three volcanoes? I'm shocked!
Signed,
Nobody intelligent
******
Dear Seattle:
I think the viaduct is very sturdy.
Signed
Homeless people's cardboard boxes, and Stone Cold Steve Austin's knees
******
Dear Mike McGinn:
Once you save Seattle, we're still going to die.
Signed,
Polar Bears
******
Dear Seattle:
We think Susan Hutchison is a very nice lady.
Signed,
Women with chronic PMS
******
Dear Major League Soccer:
You don't need the Seattle Sounders. We think MLS as we know it is totally entertaining.
Signed,
Insomniacs
******
Dear Mike McGinn:
Might want to give SDOT the route to your house for the next snowstorm.
Signed,
Greg Nickels
P.S. Instead of trying different Downtown restaurants, just order a plate from all of them at once. Saves you time and MMM MMM GOOD
******
Dear Seattle Voter:
CHEAP CIALIS,Viagra ONLINE - LOWEST NET PRICES!
Signed,
Joe Mallaspam, Nigerian Prince of Caucasia
Letting my opponent frame the debate worked wonders for me!
Signed,
John Kerry
******
Dear Washington State:
A huge magma pool under three volcanoes? I'm shocked!
Signed,
Nobody intelligent
******
Dear Seattle:
I think the viaduct is very sturdy.
Signed
Homeless people's cardboard boxes, and Stone Cold Steve Austin's knees
******
Dear Mike McGinn:
Once you save Seattle, we're still going to die.
Signed,
Polar Bears
******
Dear Seattle:
We think Susan Hutchison is a very nice lady.
Signed,
Women with chronic PMS
******
Dear Major League Soccer:
You don't need the Seattle Sounders. We think MLS as we know it is totally entertaining.
Signed,
Insomniacs
******
Dear Mike McGinn:
Might want to give SDOT the route to your house for the next snowstorm.
Signed,
Greg Nickels
P.S. Instead of trying different Downtown restaurants, just order a plate from all of them at once. Saves you time and MMM MMM GOOD
******
Dear Seattle Voter:
CHEAP CIALIS,Viagra ONLINE - LOWEST NET PRICES!
Signed,
Joe Mallaspam, Nigerian Prince of Caucasia
Letter Fiction #102609
Dear Byron Westbrook,
Don't worry about being in your brother Brian's shadow.
Signed,
Ozzie Canseco, Jeremy Giambi and Mike Maddux
******
Dear President Obama:
I'm not a racist but... when I hear the term 'blackout', I tend to take it literally.
Signed,
David Duke
P.S. No offense but DIE DIE DIE
******
Dear Brett Favre:
You have an offensive line? I'm so jealous.
Signed,
Fran Tarkenton
******
Dear VH1:
I am SO excited! I can't wait to find out the winner of Real Chance of Love 2!
Signed,
Nobody with an actual life
******
Dear Kate Gosselin:
Nice wig! Looks totally natural!
Signed
Lady Gaga
******
Dear George P Bush:
Have no fear when you run for President in 2016. We are on your side.
Signed,
Florida, Diebold and the U.S. Supreme Court
Don't worry about being in your brother Brian's shadow.
Signed,
Ozzie Canseco, Jeremy Giambi and Mike Maddux
******
Dear President Obama:
I'm not a racist but... when I hear the term 'blackout', I tend to take it literally.
Signed,
David Duke
P.S. No offense but DIE DIE DIE
******
Dear Brett Favre:
You have an offensive line? I'm so jealous.
Signed,
Fran Tarkenton
******
Dear VH1:
I am SO excited! I can't wait to find out the winner of Real Chance of Love 2!
Signed,
Nobody with an actual life
******
Dear Kate Gosselin:
Nice wig! Looks totally natural!
Signed
Lady Gaga
******
Dear George P Bush:
Have no fear when you run for President in 2016. We are on your side.
Signed,
Florida, Diebold and the U.S. Supreme Court
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